Crypto-feminism
I have thought about the girlchild and feminism long and hard.
Some days I wonder if being conservative was the only way for her to rebel against her mother. I was raised by my grandmother. Her conservativism helped to send me into gothic, feminist, motorcycle-riding rebellion.
The girlchild marched next to me as I reclaimed the night, she saw me somber for Thursdays in black. She came along to the FLAPS meetings and listened to us laugh. While I was studying at the Northern Territory University, she quietly sat next to me, drawing pictures of australopithecines when I couldn’t find childcare, but had to attend an Anthroplogy lecture. She understood the limitations and the unfairness. She is the outcome of sole-parent parenting and has seen and felt discrimination of that first-hand.
She is a strong, formidable person- and under no illusions.
She has been taught to use the tools, the knowledge and possess the confidence needed to advocate if she feels she must. Right now she is gorging on her "it" time in this society which values (and rewards) young, intelligent, beautiful people.
I will watch her maturation with interest and pride, and if she needs a refresher course in placard writing then I am her grrrl. If, in fact, she glides through life, without having to face battles related to her gender, then I am still her grrrl. My approval, love and acceptance of the girlchild is unconditional.
If my contribution to feminism has helped her (and her peers) have an easier time as women then what we were advocating for has occurred.
I continually observe her using aspects of a feminist ideology- that is the expectation of equality between the sexes. What she resists is the collectivism (and the ‘sharing’ inherent in that) and the feminist label.
There is a crypto-feminist in the house!
Image from here
March 3rd, 2006 at 7:13 am
One thing for sure- while the grrrrrclhild won’t call herself the “F” word, she also won’t have a bar of being victimised because of her femininity.
I’ve concluded that she’s a postfeminist as much as a cryptofeminist. She doesn’t rely on the ‘it’s because I’m a girl, right?’ argument- she’s toe to toe with patriarchalists (even if due to her diminutive stature, she looks them square in the chest).
It’s called equality. It’s the difference between paid maternity leave and paid parental leave.
March 3rd, 2006 at 10:10 am
Good on her. Good on you for raising a smart, tough, independent daughter. I still reckon there’s work to be done yet, because not every girl is like her. I certainly wasn’t.
March 3rd, 2006 at 1:26 pm
It is good that she takes for granted the things that people before her never could. Here is to hoping that she never has to fight for the things that were won for her by previous generations.
March 3rd, 2006 at 2:58 pm
I am no different to most parents who hope that their children benefit from our actions and our knowledge and don’t have to deal with too much pain.
Mind weezil, that look square into the chest is something she perfected all by herself; as I simply pull my advocacy boots on! 🙂
March 4th, 2006 at 7:48 am
I like the idea of the “postfeminist” tag, as it certainly engages the reality that patriarchal institutions suck for all the men who aren’t elite dynasts as much as it does for the women of the world.
So what’s gonna be the catchy name for our crypto-postfeminist activism?
March 4th, 2006 at 12:36 pm
As observed, a collective label is redundant to them.
So we know what we are describing let’s call them DS’s- Disengaged Subsystems.
March 4th, 2006 at 2:40 pm
That’s a beautifully tender post, Suki. What a lucky girl to have a strong and gentle mother.
March 4th, 2006 at 2:48 pm
Thank you Zoe.
March 8th, 2006 at 11:19 am
Thanks mama, nice to see once again i am the topic of a post 🙂
I do not like the F word because I do not need the F word. I am not taking anything for granted, I can appreciate the struggles of times past, however my generation has wisened up and realised that you can be strong without labelling yourself, stigmas are hard to kill, so even post feminism still has feminist in it, how about we go for self aware?
March 9th, 2006 at 7:03 am
Welcome to my blog sweetheart.
March 9th, 2006 at 1:51 pm
grrlchild, I’m still not seeing the downside of being a card-carrying feminist. It’s not actually a fashion statement. It’s a level-playing-field belief structure, no more, actually. You’re 97% there, but you simply eschew the ‘f’ word itself.
‘Feminist’ is usually only a dirty word when Rush Limbaugh or Alan Jones speak it.