Dear Parliamentary Secretary for Immigration Andrew Robb,

I am proud to live in a country that values equality amoungst the sexes and a quintessential opportunity to be permitted and encouraged to try, enshrined in the notion of a ‘fair go.’

I am however confused by the limits to equality that I know are government sanctioned. The ADF is a good example of this. The Australian military cannot recruit women into certain roles.

“To be eligible for service in this position you must be male. Government policy currently precludes women from being employed in certain ADF positions.”

I am wondering how you could insist that a new Australian can sign up to our values of equality between the sexes and a fair go when neither of these statements are strictly true. Australia discriminates against women in joining aspects of the ADF thereby denying them a fair go.

Please, if you go ahead with this Australian values sign up, exclude the Canadians from this exercise and save yourself considerable embarrassment as they laugh uproarously at your record of equality and a fair go in the military.

Or you could add an asterisk to denote that these Australian values have exceptions.

Or you could scrap these pathetic motherhood statements, admit your hypocrisy, and embrace diversity.

Suki Lombard
Sydney, NSW.

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This last week whilst our regular PM traveled to Washington, Chicago, Ottawa and Ireland meeting its people and defending the indefensible in Iraq, we were treated to the acting PM Peter Costello.

While HoWARd was talking up the war in Iraq, Costello was reveling in the power of the big chair in parliament. Curiously, Downer coming to the defense of A/PM Costello only underscores what I have thought for a long time. This government is an old boy’s club and only pays lip-service to a woman’s right to an equal role in society and Costello (second only to Abbott) finds it the hardest to hide his entrenched misogyny.

From a woman’s point of view the current government is a lot like the gang of likely-lads in Form II (14 – year olds) at High school. HoWARd has the Principal’s role and Vaile is his senior master. Abbott, Costello and Downer are the tough boys who leer at the girls and swagger in the hallways. They resent authority and undermine it wherever they can. Once they identify a power vacuum they stomp right in. Question time last week was such a stomp.

Costello, in particular, comes across as the natural leader of these sleazoids. When he sniffs some power he reminds me of a teenage boy who is arrogant, dismissive and has an overdeveloped sense of entitlement. Costello the adult, pretends to be inclusive and egalitarian, but he really hasn’t matured from his youth when it comes to equality, and I can sense that as a woman (and only because in his eyes I am inferior) he would politely listen to my position and all the while scan behind me for someone, anyone more male and important to interrupt us…OR he hears nothing of what I have said and he’s thinking “blah, blah, blah, nice tits.”

Ok, some of you may say, well what’s wrong with that, we all have crimethink don’t we, he’s cool and he keeps himself civil doesn’t he? Well almost. He can hold it in until he has ultimate power and then he just lets it rip. Costello took the opportunity to attack two powerful women – Julia Gillard and Claire Martin (who rejects removing customary law from sentencing).

I speak to my female friends about Costello’s sleaziness and they agree to varying degrees. Here is a snapshot of what they said:

“Oh yes, suki, he’d [Costello] never be able to truly respect a female boss.”

“That sleaze, [Costello] eeeeeewwwwwwwww…”

“I’d hate to have him as my boss and ask him [Costello] for some time off for my sick child.”

“My brother was at Monash Uni with him and said he was an insufferable prick even way back then.”

“During the RU486 conscience vote he [Costello] told a story where a medical emergency during his wife’s pregnancy forced him to decide between saving the life of his wife and that of the foetus. He told the doctor to go ahead with the pregnancy.”

I don’t think Peter Costello is at all popular with women voters or people who value and embrace equality. Future polling will reflect this, if it’s not been found already. Put him in charge- I’ll highlight his structural, endemic, deep-rooted misogyny from now until the ALP/Greens coalition forms government, or more realistically, HoWARd et. al. is voted out.

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The headline in this news report would suggest that Lara Bingle is behaving unacceptably. See, Lara is a model and Greg Bird is a footballer.

And in one sense she is.  She cannot or will not convince her employer- Priscilla model management, or Greg Bird’s employer- Shark’s Rugby league club to use the words ‘sexual harassment.’  However, this media-savvy woman has now told more people than would have known if the respective employers would have supported her.  

Lara stated that Gregs’s SMS efforts to her were "really, really crude messages." She thought if she did not respond to Bird’s text messages they would stop. Poor Lara, uncomfortable every time a message arrived on her mobile.  As it was, five or six more really, really crude messages did arrive. Lara did send one txt back. What if it read: 

"Greg u r really crude STOP txtg me."

Until women name up sexual harassment for what it is, some men, and their respective employers will think it’s acceptable.

I’ll do it for her. 

"Lara, you are a young, beautiful model and you trade desirability (and orienteering skills).  You are also protected by law from harassing/stalking behaviour.  Ignore all the minimisation (and possibly ‘you asked for it’ advice) and know your instincts about the txts not being ok are right.  You have been stalked and sexually harrassed."

The very fact that I (and hundreds of thousands of others) can read about it in the SMH tells me Lara has taken action.  She knows that she was right to be disgusted by Greg’s txts and won’t be tolerating anybody (not even her boss) telling her

"It’s nothing … this is all just so unbelievably ridiculous – a storm in tea cup."’

Three years before Lara was born the Sex Discrimination Act 1984 came into effect. 

I have thought about the girlchild and feminism long and hard.

Some days I wonder if being conservative was the only way for her to rebel against her mother.  I was raised by my grandmother. Her conservativism helped to send me into gothic, feminist, motorcycle-riding rebellion.

The girlchild marched next to me as I reclaimed the night, she saw me somber for Thursdays in black.  She came along to the FLAPS meetings and listened to us laugh.  While I was studying at the Northern Territory University, she quietly sat next to me, drawing pictures of australopithecines when I couldn’t find childcare, but had to attend an Anthroplogy lecture. She understood the limitations and the unfairness.  She is the outcome of sole-parent parenting and has seen and felt discrimination of that first-hand.

She is a strong, formidable person- and under no illusions.

She has been taught to use the tools, the knowledge and possess the confidence needed to advocate if she feels she must.  Right now she is gorging on her "it" time in this society which values (and rewards) young, intelligent, beautiful people.

I will watch her maturation with interest and pride, and if she needs a refresher course in placard writing then I am her grrrl.  If,  in fact, she glides through life, without having to face battles related to her gender, then I am still her grrrl.  My approval, love and acceptance of the girlchild is unconditional.

If my contribution to feminism has helped her (and her peers) have an easier time as women then what we were advocating for has occurred. 

I continually observe her using aspects of a feminist ideology- that is the expectation of equality between the sexes.  What she resists is the collectivism (and the ‘sharing’ inherent in that) and the feminist label.

There is a crypto-feminist in the house!  

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I recently found myself discussing whether young women define themselves as feminists or not with a fellow blogger. It was not long after the RU486 vote came down and the country was reminded of the power of four women.

My theory is that feminism is a historical term that defines a time when women’s rights had to be fought for inch by inch. That said, not all our rights have been won, or will be won. However, instead of gen X and Y seeing issues as being structural, related to gender, young women see them as individual issues. They respond with individual rights and micro-collectivism.

Girls from a Melbourne school recently did just that when one of their friends was asked to remove a t-shirt that said:

“Nobody knows I’m a lesbian”

Not only did this young woman not comply, but her friends wore t-shirts that read:

“Nobody knows I am bulimic”

“Nobody knows I’m pregnant”

“Nobody knows I’m on steroids”.

As I observe the girlchild, her girlfriends and her peers (be they straight, lesbian or bisexual), I believe they don’t need the term to differentiate from non-assertive women as they take their rights as given. These include sexual and reproductive rights. They don’t need the term to differentiate themselves as assertive women as young men have also been exposed to feminism and equality and behave accordingly. The girlchild’s boytoy is typical of his peers. He is is non-predatory and shares (as a given) the power dynamic within the relationship. They earn similar incomes and both have cars.

Perhaps it is only as our girls age and enter the workforce with a view to a career, attempt to balance work and family and sense that the barriers are broader than the individual, will they need to gather as a greater collective and change the status quo. Or, perhaps me and my generation sit in the last remnants of patriarchy, with our bitterness and our cynicism.

Our girls will command the earning power and just buy what they need.

I’m choosing to believe that four women in government can continue to make a difference. Those of us who are just so 70’s worry too much and the girls who are not noting this as an historic event are busy asserting their individual entitlements.

“Oh Mama, all that feminist shit is just so 70’s”- so sayeth the girlchild.

I take comfort in the knowledge that she can be dismissive because she does feel equal.

Image from here